Saving changes

My blog is taking a new turn from here. This haven will hold more than prose and literary pieces; it will be home to beautiful moments of simple life. Gone are the days where I had to hide behind metaphors and lines. This is freedom writing...

It's been over a year that I have been in a new place, that I think I can almost call home. Change has surrounded me. All I know is that worst is over and that the best is yet to come. So much is different now; I have a full time job, a bank account, my own space. Biggest of all is I get to make my own decisions. Considering all of the above is pretty cool, I have to say it's been rather scary too. Going out into the world after years of being held back is overwhelming. It's a blur and everything seems so loud and bright. I am learning all over again how to live life as normal. I started off horribly, indecisive of what I should wear, how much I spend and what to do on a long awaited weekend. My dreams are reality and I'm still sitting in bed wondering where to start from.

To start of, I have a great job. The organization I work for is a refuge in its own way to vulnerable people all around. Everywhere you turn, you always see someone in need, in a battle worse than your own. Some don't have food, nor clothing. While others don't even have a place to live. Dubai seems like a kind of Heaven compared to a city bursting with dynamics in the shadows of poverty and corruption. I soon realized that I had left a hopeless foreign land only to come to a place where everyone fights for the right to be heard. I work as a communications programme officer at my NGO but often time my creativity takes a U-turn when a woman in distress walks in with a story of pain and abuse. Often times it feels like a audible reflection of the things of my past and I surprise myself as I find my eyes tearing up at such injustice in so many lives. "I am lucky" I tell myself for I know that it's not often that one has the privilege of turning on a new leaf with the least of hassles.

“Go boldly and honestly through the world. Learn to love the fact that there is nobody else quite like you.” — Daniel Radcliffe

 

In the months gone by I have encountered so much that is new from walking in the rain, to scurrying lizards. I have made the most amazing friends from around the world and experienced the generosity of those who are hardly acquaintances. I am becoming new and realizing that I can never be who I once was.

Just last week my roommates and I opened our home to a young girl who was kidnapped when she was a child. This kid has no where she belongs, no sense of right or wrong, nothing. In spite of being flustered by her mannerisms deep inside I wondered what if this girl was me. I anxiously imagined not knowing where I came from with no sight of the the future. I wondered how afraid I would have been and the desperation for some light to come. At this moment I finally felt I was ready to accept these changes in my life and press forward, believing it only gets better. I sat on my bed, thankful that from deep oceans, I have been washed to shores of care and belonging.  I travail my path with hope, boldness, and value for the simple things in life that I have the privilege of now experiencing.

For to be free is mot merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enchances the freedom of others  - Nelson Mandela

Real Stories

So many of us are too ashamed to share our stories thinking that they are unworthy of being told because of our fallout, immoralities and more. We hide the truth and cover the stains that seem so ugly. Little do we know that there is a power in confession.. confession of the truth even if it’s the brutal truth about our very lives.  The mere utterance of it not only brings liberation but frees those who hear our stories, especially those whose world secretly collides with ours.

You see, the perfect stories are the imperfect ones.. the ones that are raw and uncut. They are the ones that don’t have anything missing.  How ever, we often try to be selective about what we say but that holds no power. Power is in the details that we often hide away and push under the rug. Those are the details that make our stories real and that reach out to the lives of others. It’s the dark stuff that act as a beacon of light to those who are too afraid to lift up their voice to say they are being wronged because they think their sin is to be blamed.

But when we show ourselves as imperfect people, these very hearts who silently struggle realize that there is hope and that they don’t have to be perfect to be justified in their cause. And in bringing them hope, our stories serve a purpose beyond ourselves, encouraging us, our lives as we glorify the Author.

Originally dated: 23/1/2011

Falling Short

At the end of the day, we have all sinned.. we've all fallen short. And the only thing that sets us apart is who's being real about it... who has the courage and the heart to be humble about one's failings in the light of their defense.