Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fear. Show all posts

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Saving changes

My blog is taking a new turn from here. This haven will hold more than prose and literary pieces; it will be home to beautiful moments of simple life. Gone are the days where I had to hide behind metaphors and lines. This is freedom writing...

It's been over a year that I have been in a new place, that I think I can almost call home. Change has surrounded me. All I know is that worst is over and that the best is yet to come. So much is different now; I have a full time job, a bank account, my own space. Biggest of all is I get to make my own decisions. Considering all of the above is pretty cool, I have to say it's been rather scary too. Going out into the world after years of being held back is overwhelming. It's a blur and everything seems so loud and bright. I am learning all over again how to live life as normal. I started off horribly, indecisive of what I should wear, how much I spend and what to do on a long awaited weekend. My dreams are reality and I'm still sitting in bed wondering where to start from.

To start of, I have a great job. The organization I work for is a refuge in its own way to vulnerable people all around. Everywhere you turn, you always see someone in need, in a battle worse than your own. Some don't have food, nor clothing. While others don't even have a place to live. Dubai seems like a kind of Heaven compared to a city bursting with dynamics in the shadows of poverty and corruption. I soon realized that I had left a hopeless foreign land only to come to a place where everyone fights for the right to be heard. I work as a communications programme officer at my NGO but often time my creativity takes a U-turn when a woman in distress walks in with a story of pain and abuse. Often times it feels like a audible reflection of the things of my past and I surprise myself as I find my eyes tearing up at such injustice in so many lives. "I am lucky" I tell myself for I know that it's not often that one has the privilege of turning on a new leaf with the least of hassles.

“Go boldly and honestly through the world. Learn to love the fact that there is nobody else quite like you.” — Daniel Radcliffe

 

In the months gone by I have encountered so much that is new from walking in the rain, to scurrying lizards. I have made the most amazing friends from around the world and experienced the generosity of those who are hardly acquaintances. I am becoming new and realizing that I can never be who I once was.

Just last week my roommates and I opened our home to a young girl who was kidnapped when she was a child. This kid has no where she belongs, no sense of right or wrong, nothing. In spite of being flustered by her mannerisms deep inside I wondered what if this girl was me. I anxiously imagined not knowing where I came from with no sight of the the future. I wondered how afraid I would have been and the desperation for some light to come. At this moment I finally felt I was ready to accept these changes in my life and press forward, believing it only gets better. I sat on my bed, thankful that from deep oceans, I have been washed to shores of care and belonging.  I travail my path with hope, boldness, and value for the simple things in life that I have the privilege of now experiencing.

For to be free is mot merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enchances the freedom of others  - Nelson Mandela

Monday, July 16, 2012

Freedom Fighters


I don’t know where you endure or who you are, yet I know you are somewhere out there, unnoticed and undone. Even more I know we share the mysteries of the same story.

Our prisons have no walls, our fears torment us and our voices go unheard. It has become the norm to be silenced. No one will see the world through our eyes, like a bird in her cage chasing freedom in every breath. Our lives are not our own yet only we know our own bitterness.

But let us believe that there is a God out there who is a an ever present witness to our lives, a God who doesn’t let any detail go unnoticed..One who will decree justice in our favour for the times we’ve borne the pain that our minds and bodies could not comprehend nor contain.

I hope you are fighting to live that you may make it out a freedom fighter

Dated: July 3rd 2010